I am no professional and I am not a nice person.
I don't want to rant but when you tell me something and then don't do it, it doesn't help.
It really fucking doesn't help.
Dec 27, 2007
Dec 26, 2007
Dec 23, 2007
work work
I'm now back in the dull, dull office and my eyes are closing.
I didn't sleep well at all and I kept waking up to pee. Also, the excitement of Man Utd vs Everton kept the adrenaline pumping in me.
My ipod is now playing My chemical Reomance's Disenchanted.
It really is a beautiful song.
I didn't sleep well at all and I kept waking up to pee. Also, the excitement of Man Utd vs Everton kept the adrenaline pumping in me.
My ipod is now playing My chemical Reomance's Disenchanted.
It really is a beautiful song.
Dec 17, 2007
A wish
hello stephanie leonidas.
I have decided.
The coolest thing anyone can give me for christmas is the Mirrormask Dvd.
maybe they'll leave me alone
His name is Kaka.
He belongs to jesus (:
Congrats to him on winning the World Player of the Year.
Channel NewsAsia played a short tribute to him in the news this morning.
I really like football. I may not be very good at it, but I love it all the same.
It really is a wonderful game.
Dec 16, 2007
Lonely
15 days before the end of the year and the recurring theme of 2007 would be that of loneliness, of failure and of despondency.
Looking at the pictures taken with people, I see my happy faces but it does seem to be just a mask for our underlying problems.
I remember when I first came into Hwachong, the principal said "Hwachong is not just a place for you to excel academically; It is also a haven for you to build lasting relationships with peers of your own age."
Now I dare say I have finished Junior College and yet all I feel is a sense that JC does not bring people together; It just drives people apart.
I guess it was always going to be a tall order when you put the brightests minds of the nation under one roof and expect them to be one big happy family. Over the past 2 years, I have seen how people increasingly lived for themselves. For their dreams, for their aspirations.
I am not going to use this post to accuse people of selfishness and greed because lets face it: If we didn't work for ourselves, we wouldn't be here.
And there is nothing wrong with living for yourself.
I myself have given up lots of class outings, soccer sessions and whatnot to study for whatever test or exam to give me a leg up over my peers.
Having done all that, all I can feel is a feeling of regret. Regret that I never got to interact with the people in my class; Regret on how my classmates are going to end up as increasingly distant acquaintances till they fade into the obscurity of my memories.
I do treasure the few friends I have made, and I do hope that we can still keep in touch.
Now, this post may seem to be an emo rant but I do not feel emo. I am strangely bereft of emotion and this does seem to be comforting in a strange twisted kind of way.
This year has seen the making of friends, the strengthening of old relationships, they fading of others.
I guess this is how humanity works.
Nevertheless, I am thankful for the experiences I have experienced this year. From heartwrenching agony of soccer to the exciting periods of the first three months when I had like 28 angels, I have sampled a plethora of experiences.
I am sorry for how fragmented and disorganised this post seems but this is just a way for me to pen down all my thoughts.
The only time we waste our life is when we think we are alone. -Mitch Albom
A recurring topic I have used for a great majority of my univesity applications is that of dreams. While talking to some of my friends, I realise that many of them held such great dreams and yet did not do anything concrete to realise their dreams. It is kinda sad as you see how people just accepted that dreams do not come true and they did a job they hated to survive; to allow them to gain social recognition and to go with the flow.
I hope that it does not come to this for me as I have great dreams for myself. Really.
A passage that I particularly enjoy is that by steve jobs.
This speech was entitled Stay hungry, Stay foolish and it was given to the Graduating class of 2005, Stanford University.
Excerpt:"
No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. Yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. One day, you too will die and you will be replaced. Sorry for sounding so melodramatic but that is the way it is. And that is the way it should be, as death is the single best invention of life. It changes life, clearing out the old for the new. And this is important as this means your time is limited, don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other people's opinions drown out your inner voice. Most importantly, have the courage to follow your own heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. This approach has always worked for me and I believe it would work for you too.
(:
Looking at the pictures taken with people, I see my happy faces but it does seem to be just a mask for our underlying problems.
I remember when I first came into Hwachong, the principal said "Hwachong is not just a place for you to excel academically; It is also a haven for you to build lasting relationships with peers of your own age."
Now I dare say I have finished Junior College and yet all I feel is a sense that JC does not bring people together; It just drives people apart.
I guess it was always going to be a tall order when you put the brightests minds of the nation under one roof and expect them to be one big happy family. Over the past 2 years, I have seen how people increasingly lived for themselves. For their dreams, for their aspirations.
I am not going to use this post to accuse people of selfishness and greed because lets face it: If we didn't work for ourselves, we wouldn't be here.
And there is nothing wrong with living for yourself.
I myself have given up lots of class outings, soccer sessions and whatnot to study for whatever test or exam to give me a leg up over my peers.
Having done all that, all I can feel is a feeling of regret. Regret that I never got to interact with the people in my class; Regret on how my classmates are going to end up as increasingly distant acquaintances till they fade into the obscurity of my memories.
I do treasure the few friends I have made, and I do hope that we can still keep in touch.
Now, this post may seem to be an emo rant but I do not feel emo. I am strangely bereft of emotion and this does seem to be comforting in a strange twisted kind of way.
This year has seen the making of friends, the strengthening of old relationships, they fading of others.
I guess this is how humanity works.
Nevertheless, I am thankful for the experiences I have experienced this year. From heartwrenching agony of soccer to the exciting periods of the first three months when I had like 28 angels, I have sampled a plethora of experiences.
I am sorry for how fragmented and disorganised this post seems but this is just a way for me to pen down all my thoughts.
The only time we waste our life is when we think we are alone. -Mitch Albom
A recurring topic I have used for a great majority of my univesity applications is that of dreams. While talking to some of my friends, I realise that many of them held such great dreams and yet did not do anything concrete to realise their dreams. It is kinda sad as you see how people just accepted that dreams do not come true and they did a job they hated to survive; to allow them to gain social recognition and to go with the flow.
I hope that it does not come to this for me as I have great dreams for myself. Really.
A passage that I particularly enjoy is that by steve jobs.
This speech was entitled Stay hungry, Stay foolish and it was given to the Graduating class of 2005, Stanford University.
Excerpt:"
No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. Yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. One day, you too will die and you will be replaced. Sorry for sounding so melodramatic but that is the way it is. And that is the way it should be, as death is the single best invention of life. It changes life, clearing out the old for the new. And this is important as this means your time is limited, don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other people's opinions drown out your inner voice. Most importantly, have the courage to follow your own heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. This approach has always worked for me and I believe it would work for you too.
(:
Dec 15, 2007
Dec 12, 2007
Dec 11, 2007
Smile fades in the summer; I'll leave when I wanna
It seems even the gods are trying to prevent me from exercising as everyday when I reach home the skies are pouring. Oh well, who am I to argue with divine intervention. (:
Had a really nice talk with QingSheng last night. It has been ages since I last saw him and I think we're meeting this weekend! A nice, faggy drinking session or something. YUPP (:
And I really can't believe the way Singapore got pwned last night. Wtf wtf wtf to thailand wtf wtf wtf.
Had a really nice talk with QingSheng last night. It has been ages since I last saw him and I think we're meeting this weekend! A nice, faggy drinking session or something. YUPP (:
And I really can't believe the way Singapore got pwned last night. Wtf wtf wtf to thailand wtf wtf wtf.
Dec 9, 2007
top of the world
all the roads lead to where you are;
and all the street lights shine like they were stars
and all the street lights shine like they were stars
It's my lunch break now and I've been surfing up on some old friends blogs and trying to read up on their life. I do feel a tinge of nostalgia especially when I see how much we have changed. I don't think I will recognise them if i pass them on the street and neither do i think they will recognise me.
Which is really kind of sad cause I've never been very good with the whole best friends forever kind of thing. I'm irritable, short tempered and sometimes just plain annoying. I have little patience especially with incompetence, definitely.
I guess this is why the friends that i DO manage to hold for long are people I would stick with come hell or high water. I am thankful to all of you and I do hope that we can stay like this.
I remeber the days of Primary School where we were all in Blue Shorts and Yellow Shirts and we were are round and cuddly cute. It seems a lifetime ago but that was when I seriously looked forward to school where we played catching during recess and ate Jelly that cost 20 cents for lunch.
Miraculously, I still remember my Primary school teachers especially a Ms Teo during Primary 3 which planted the budding seeds of anger and angst into me. She gave me hell, oh yeah.
I just thought that all I can think about my past life is school, school and more school related activities. My mother always tells me of how she had so much fun out of school and when its my turn I don't have any such recollection. Bloody hell.
I think Up Against The Wall by Boys Like Girls is one of my favourite songs now and I have looped it in my ipod for the past half an hour.
Ok I have 20 mins of lunch left. bye.
Which is really kind of sad cause I've never been very good with the whole best friends forever kind of thing. I'm irritable, short tempered and sometimes just plain annoying. I have little patience especially with incompetence, definitely.
I guess this is why the friends that i DO manage to hold for long are people I would stick with come hell or high water. I am thankful to all of you and I do hope that we can stay like this.
I remeber the days of Primary School where we were all in Blue Shorts and Yellow Shirts and we were are round and cuddly cute. It seems a lifetime ago but that was when I seriously looked forward to school where we played catching during recess and ate Jelly that cost 20 cents for lunch.
Miraculously, I still remember my Primary school teachers especially a Ms Teo during Primary 3 which planted the budding seeds of anger and angst into me. She gave me hell, oh yeah.
I just thought that all I can think about my past life is school, school and more school related activities. My mother always tells me of how she had so much fun out of school and when its my turn I don't have any such recollection. Bloody hell.
I think Up Against The Wall by Boys Like Girls is one of my favourite songs now and I have looped it in my ipod for the past half an hour.
Ok I have 20 mins of lunch left. bye.
Dec 7, 2007
work sucks, I know
To all of you that gripe on how studying isn't fun and is boring, how would you like to spend your whole day filing, digging out name cards from a bucket and entering the details into a microsoft excel file, photocopying 280324 copies of something that looks like gibberish to you?
No?
Good. Start studying.
Cause work is seriously seriously @#$%@#$% leh. Every morning I wake up and I drag my ass to shenton way. I seriously do not know how people can live like that, where the office is deathly quiet with no one willing to smile or talk to you. I miss school. ):
School is how slack lah.
Anyways I've finished majority of my applications except the middlebury one. Heh I hope I have not just thrown about approximately 1k into the rubbish bin.
EDIT: Ok after much thought work isn't that bad. My supervisors are all moving millions of dollars everyday to buy grain and wheat futures (I work in a trading firm) and it does look terribly exciting. But to get there, you gotta study. Get it?
No?
Good. Start studying.
Cause work is seriously seriously @#$%@#$% leh. Every morning I wake up and I drag my ass to shenton way. I seriously do not know how people can live like that, where the office is deathly quiet with no one willing to smile or talk to you. I miss school. ):
School is how slack lah.
Anyways I've finished majority of my applications except the middlebury one. Heh I hope I have not just thrown about approximately 1k into the rubbish bin.
EDIT: Ok after much thought work isn't that bad. My supervisors are all moving millions of dollars everyday to buy grain and wheat futures (I work in a trading firm) and it does look terribly exciting. But to get there, you gotta study. Get it?
Dec 4, 2007
the rat race
I'm sitting in at my desk now and im struggling to keep my eyes open. tequila is awesome, but tequila 4 hours before work is not.
prom was fun. please, facebook the photos.
prom was fun. please, facebook the photos.
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